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You've seen the signs on the backs of semis. "How am I driving? Call
1 800 EAT DIRT." Or something to that effect. Those signs are
inspired by a serious version with a real 800-number. Don't you like vulgar version
better? Or do you like being asked to be a snitch?
And what about those comment cards
you find in your favorite franchise restaurant? The ones that ask you to rate the
performance your server. Someone who's no doubt underpaid, overworked, and at the mercy of
some short-tempered, short-order cook.
Every employer wants to inspire great job performance, better customer relations, and
maybe even a creative suggestion now and then. But they're certainly not going to get any
of those things by holding a hatchet over their workers' heads.
Remember the 7th grade tattletale? You know, the nerd who used to volunteer to take
names in the lavatory. Why would any employer want to be like him? What's the difference
between relying on the word of the class nerd and taking phone
calls or comment cards from the general public? Do employers honestly expect to raise
morale with the likes of a lavatory monitor?
Remember what happened to him, don't you? They made him eat the urinal wafer.
Of course, I always fill out comment cards. They go something
like this: Pay your people well. Give them room to grow. Listen to their ideas. Let them
share in your accomplishments. And you won't have to print anymore of these nasty little
cards.
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